To: Lena
From: Amanda
From now on, any requests for “grapes” “strawberries” and “juice” will be answered with the management’s favorites of Nacho Cheese Doritos, Swedish Fish, and Dr. Pepper. Also, it is imperative that you throw a fit next to the frozen french fries instead of the broccoli. Your “snack foods” of pretzels, 100% juice fruit snacks and string cheese are no longer allowed in the house. The management would appreciate your support in this matter, as she is unable to productively avoid cleaning up your simultaneous games of closet destruction, peanut butter art, and 852 card pick upwithout a little stress relieving guilty food snacking. And whereas, she is a selfless being who would never, ever, ever, buy food for herself if she is the only person in the house who likes it, you must develop a taste for her favorite foods, in as much as you request them at the store. After that, you may forget about them promptly.
someday little lena as going to look back and say lovingly, “what the heck???”
Comment by jenica — October 11, 2007 @ 8:32 pm